Discouraged or Just Not Thinking Straight?

Lately I have been so busy with work and with the family events that have taken place that I really have felt a bit of depression trying to sneak it's way into my heart. Not wanting to get discouraged in the midst of all that is going on, I look to Jesus as the Author and Perfecter of my faith. Sounds like the right thing to say....doesn't it? Well, not being a "sounds like the right thing to say" kinda gal, I must confess, I have been asking the Lord exactly what He is up to in my life. As I think back over the past few years and all of the places that He has asked me to trust Him and to trust what He is doing, I am reminded once again that He is not in need of anything from me. He does, however, want a few things from me. Trusting Him with EVERYTHING is one of the things He is asking of me at this time in my life. And He does ask that I come to Him for every need that I have. When I do come to Him, He is ever faithful to accept me right where I am and never rejects me. This is a very comforting thought. To know that the Lord of all creation cares for me and for my hurts and wants to comfort me in my time of heartache...that is still so very amazing to me.

As I was whining to Him one evening...."Lord, you have taken away every ministry I was involved in except for the church cleaning committee," or "Lord, why if I have raised my children to follow you, then why are you allowing them to go down the paths they have chosen?" or "Why, Lord, does there seem to be a disconnect among so many women that I know love and follow You?" or "I feel You calling me to serve, but why is the door not being opened for that to happen right now?"........He gently reminded me that His ways are better than my ways and His thoughts are higher than my thought. So much for that pity party!

With all of the pressure of discouragement that is currently surrounding me, even now as I write this, I am sure of one thing.....that he who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete it! Not in my time or according to my terms or in the way that I see it going....not my life according to me rather my life according to Him! This is true freedom in Jesus! To be His and to reflect His glory in a hurting and sinful world. Praying that He would bring me anything that brings Him glory.....yes, wholeheartedly, I say "Anything, Lord." Bring it on! For in these times, that is when I am forced to fully rely on You!

I have grown more in the past two years of struggle than I have grown during my entire Christian walk. All the praise be to the One Who is more than able to accomplish in me more than I could ever hope, dream or imagine!